Another digression...what's in a name?

I have been writing thankyou cards to people and can see how differently I sign my name depending on the recipient. I respond to many names , mostly without any hesitiation. I'm sure when my parents named me Hilary Joan they did not anticipate any confusion arising in the future but Alan was unwittingly ( perhaps with some help from my father) behind  the fact that that has happened.

Mum wanted me known as Hilary Joan ...the whole double-barrel but as Alan was still only a toddler I became None  and somehow my name within the family became Joan. All his life my father called me None and even wrote to me that way. Outside the family I was always Hilary.

All this came to mind when at my birthday luncheon my brother-in-law -when speaking -referred to me as Joan and I saw a few facial queries around the room. As the Darmody family had met me in a family situation they  knew me only as Joan and always call me that. Last year one of Bill's nephews asked him why I had "changed" my name so I can see it is time I explained why I am known by two names.

For all the years before marriage I responded without thought to either name though I repeat that Joan was used only within the  family and elsewhere I was always Hilary. Once I left Brisbane ,and apart from my immediate family ,I have always been known as Hilary.  As my mother grew older she wrote to me as <Dear Hilary> which later became <Hilary Dear> and gradually both Alan and Lois have come to call me Hilary so I now dont think of myself as Joan. Though I still respond to it easily in a Darmody situation, it does not come easily to me to write it or sign myself that way, so if you receive a letter etc from me it may be signed Hilary, Hilary Joan, HJoan or HilaryJ...
I'm sorry if it is confusing to others but I know who I am! and Bill has become quite accustomed to calling me by either name depending on to whom  he is speaking!
In a nutshell, if you are a Darmody relation you are welcome to call me Joan but to everyone else I am Hilary.